So this post is about Hum and Tum, He and She, He by me and She by her(my co-author: ANKITA SHARMA)
He: OK. There was this girl with a beautymark on her left cheek in my class. She was calm but confident. When I first saw her, something happened in my chest. It was constricting, my heart was being pricked by something, my stomach was tingling. I thought, “forget it, it happens with every second pretty girl I see.” 😀
So the days went on and nothing spectacular happened until one day I crashed onto her(by mistake ofcourse :D,and not too hard). I said sorry, she smiled and said, its ok and she went on. But I? Well actually its hard to explain, her lean body and the intensity of crash was not enough to do any physical damage to any of us but it did crash my mental framework as if it got crushed by a truck. The cupid’s arrow struck me and I had fallen, fallen for her. The time stood still, my heart was banging. But for the natural instincts in me to say sorry, I couldn’t have said a single word. It was the first time I was feeling like this.
So now the world was a new and a better place to live in for me. I stole the glances of her face in the class, I tried to listen her voices when she was talking to her friends, and tried unsuccessfully to approach her many a times till I succeeded at last. So now we were in talking terms. Her voice had some mesmerizing element in it which I got addicted to. The glow on her face shadowed the whole world in the background. I used to try to think what she might be thinking about me. I used to think how I could make her happy. I was linked to her each face expression. Her smile made me smile, her frown made me sad, her neglect broke my heart. We became friends thats what she thought but for me she was my reason to smile. I looked for reasons to hear her voice called her for absurd queries, I messaged her all night. I knew I had fallen for her but I was so deep in trouble I never realized.Every expression of her made me fall for her even more. Before I knew I was crazy about her and everything she said. One fine day in one of our conversations on one of her cute little expression of annoyance I let the three most dangerous words slip out of my mouth. She was furious and that was the time I realized I lost her. I apologized but she denied to talk to me. I felt helpless, I lost her…perhaps forever and my heart ached to hear her voice. I couldn’t sleep she stopped taking my calls. I asked her friends to convey my apologies but she had turned to ice and my life had changed for she was not a part of it. I cursed myself for being so stupid to tell my true feelings. and so days and months passed and I couldn’t acknowledge anything or anyone except her. But life is after all not so unfair and one fine day she approached me to leave the past behind and be friends again. I had never forgotten her and after a lot of apprehensions again I proposed to her.
She: So He finally proposes to me.I wouldn’t say I expected him to propose me neither did I wanted to get involved. I tried too hard not to say a yes to his proposal but some people acquire an indispensable place in our life and the heart denies to let them go for the care and the fondness they show and it gets impossible for the brain to reason with the heart. And after lot of days of denying and not accepting here I say a YES. I still wouldn’t say its love I like him ya I like him. He is really sweet, always taking care of me, I can talk and talk to him for hours he is never bored of what I say no matter how irrelevant my thoughts and acts are they always seem cute damn I REALLY LIKE HIM. and so days pass on..and the endless talk continues. He has won over me. I dont feel complete anymore without him and yes I know, I know I LOVE HIM.Well its been two years with him and with a few disagreements I am very happy to have him in my life and blessed be all those circumstances which got us together and I truly madly deeply LOVE HIM. In two years a lot of things hv changed we dont take long strolls for he always has a prior commitment either with friends or his books I am not complaining but I miss the guy I fell in love with I miss him, I am surprised to know how I embarrass him easily and quite often now. We have been fighting a lot and on trivial issues every now and then, my tears made him cry but strangely enough off late he has been the reason for lot of them. He claims we have grown up and need to be more responsible but I fail to justify with his excuses to not see me. He says LIFE has changed. I say it sure has for the one who is MY life has. I dont how and when so much has changed I always knew life would not always be rosy but I had a stronger faith in our love. I knew in my heart we would face every struggle and come through the tough times though with few scars but nevertheless in love with each other.ALAS! I was wrong so was my heart in believing that HE would be the one who would hold my hand all my life and be there forever and ever.
Today it will be a year since he asked me to part ways for he is not in love with me, for I am too obsessive and he thinks I have changed. I didnt try to explain him anything I didn’t shed a tear but my heart sank the moment I saw his eyes for I could not find any love for me no matter how hard I tried. I knew it was over for him, and as for me he never asked what I wanted how much I wanted to hold on to him. HE had decided about the situation I won’t call it a relation anymore. HE had to move on. Its been a year since I saw him last in the same coffee shop we had come for our 1st date and many more. I still come here often alone just to sit and relive all the moments together.I dont hate him for not loving me. I hate myself for still loving him.YES HE changed my life from the day he proposed me to this date. I hv not stopped thinking about him and I doubt if I would ever..
and dis the story which resides in every girls life chapter and a HE always stays though locked up in the little broken piece of her heart..!!
As a footnote: It must be obvious that this is fiction, as I never crashed into a gal UNINTENTIONALLY. ;). And for her part she’s having a wonderful life with her love. 🙂
As another footnote: Tats the reason I want to stay away from love. 🙂