You are reading this post so I assume that you read my previous post “7 days to fall in love for dummies” and you established yourself as a romantic couple. So now you think you are no more a dummy. But then bitter truths falls on us at the time least expected. So ofcourse not surprisingly for me, you want to throw away this title. Reason might be you got bored, or your subject’s friend is getting hotter and hotter day by day or whatever it might be but you are again having that very feeling of dumbness for you dont know how to breakup. Dont worry, I am again there to rescue you from this cruelty. 😛
Some of the readers of the previous post, for reasons so obvious, were eagerly waiting for my next post on “7 days to fall out of love for dummies”. For those readers, I owe my apologies, for I got delayed by the midsems which were playing havoc with my CPI. Though I dont know whether I was successful in saving my CPI from that butcher’s knife, but I sure do have some good news for you guys and gals(you were the ones eagerly waiting. :P).
Before I even started to run my highly intelligent brain(sorry for boasting, but you atleast owe me this 😛 ) on this extremely urgent topic, I got a proposal for the algorithm. It was about the break-up week, where you get to breakup in 7 days, the days being: Missing day, Jhagda day, Confession Day, Slap Day, Kick Day, Hate Day and finally Break Day, I thought, “huh!Do you really require 7 day to breakup. What a waste of time.”. Now the urgency was further increased for the humanity was in wrong hands. I had to bring forth a better algorithm to save the humanity. And so I invented this efficient step by step guide to breakup in 3 days. So lets directly get to it for a lot many of you must be cursing me for this long buildup. 😀
3 Days to Fall Out of Love for Dummies
PROLOGUE: You proved your mettle by becoming an established romantic couple, some credit to me ofcourse. 😀 But now you are in trouble.Its impossible to bear the torture.You desperately need a change. So you again resort to me. To get you out of trouble, I conjure this guide,step by step instructions to successfully have a breakup. Similar to the previous guide, this one is also based on credit system, the credits lead you to breakup.
DAY-1: The Decision Day.
So you decide to have a breakup. My suggestion to you for this day is to enjoy this day as much as you can. 😉 Just utilize the credits you gained as recklessly as you want. Just pour them like water.By doing so, you may infact gain some breakup-credits. 😉 Morover once you breakup, the credits would be no more valid, they would expire. And I know that you all agree that its better to use them than to throw them away in trash. 😛
DAY-2: The Provocation Day.
You might be wondering what credits have to do here in breakup. I ll tell you now. I believe that it was you who toiled during the valentine’s week. So why not let her have the command during this breakup week. So the more credits you gain, the more easier the breakup will be.
Today is the provocation day. You have to provocate your subject. Do something which doesnt please her. Try to flirt with her friends, ignore her to stare at a hot gal. Use your imagination. Prove her you can win over any gal.:P The more you provocate her, the more credits you gain. Bonus if you could tell her on her face that you are not interested in her, but ofcourse I dont recommend that, for I dont want it to be your last day. 😀
DAY-3: The BreakUp Day.
So the day of freedom arrives. You have provocated her, you have gained credits, now you just need an ignition. Just irritate her somehow, and you are done. “I need to talk to you.” Those very words which you were so eager to listen.She begins the fight, dont let it stop. Just keep on fuelling it by suitable punch lines. You may even praise her friends if you feel the heat subsiding. Just keep in mind that if you fail today, you ll again have to bear the torture for 3 more days. Fight as if you ll die if you lose.
As there is no three word protocol like “I love you” for breaking up so you might get to listen a lot many variants. Just assume they all mean “I am breaking up with you”. Hurray you are out of it finally. Congrats! Just a note, atleast inform your friends about the plans for this day, because if things go wrong, you dont want to be late to be fetched to the hospital. 😀
EPILOGUE: So now you are a free bird. You have mastered in the makeup, breakup. You may now want to consider decreasing the establishment time, for 7 days is a hell lot of a time. So keep me updated if you get an even better algo. You’d be serving the humanity. 😛
Analysis of my Algo: Consider the previous algo where you need 7 days to breakup. In a year, you could be with just 24 gals. But considering the reduced time of my algo, you can be with 36 gals a year. Thats a great improvement I assume. 😛
loved the effeiciency analysis at the end…
and of course… an excellent read as always…
i will murder u !!!
tera cat ka result nhn aaya to meri galti hai kya… 😛
ok, i ll say it.
YOU ARE A GENIUS DUDE!!
dude … why don’t u write a book ? har post pe comment kar-karke thak gaya yar mai to …
o bhai, jyada hawa mein na uda…!!!
salle IIT main waise hi kam ladkiyan hoti hai…….upar se hamesha sari achi ladkiyan dusre college main ya dusre batch main hi hoti hai……….
kyun apni credit kharab kar raha hai……….!!!
PS awesome writing style …. enjoyed till last……