Life is not a bed of roses, neither is it fair. I had my own moments of victory, I had my own moments of defeat. Victories used to fill me up with a fresh wave of confidence, while the defeats used to suck it all up. The cycle used to go on until recently.
Surprisingly and paradoxically, the last few defeats have had a completely different effect on me. Eventually I gained confidence through them instead of losing it. Being asked for my password to app on my behalf, getting calls which were to make sure that I was fine, receiving messages from half-expected persons, nullified the effects of defeat. I laughed at myself for being so stupid.
“dont worry, lag jayegi intern. And I believe something better is waiting for u. :)”
The last two lines of this message struck me. The last one made me smile for I imagined the smile on the sender’s face and the second last one led me into thinking. My whole life had been marked by last moment decision changes mostly which were not under my control. And everytime, I thanked god for these decisive moment decision changes for they have always proved correct. The courses which I took at the decisive points dint even used to be in the inventory list. I admit that I have a very poor foresight. I dont want to decide where will I be 15 years from now, because even at the end of 14th year I wont be so sure about it. I believe life is not just a set of completely independent co-incidences, but each event in life carries some significance associated with it. And maybe this one has its own share of significance too.
Now I ve started believing that something better is waiting for me. I just have to prove myself by working even harder. I have to increase my level of excellence for the one on which I am standing now is not enough, as has been proved repeatedly. Now I dont fear failures, for I know I have people to catch me if I fall. 🙂